Naked squirrels

This morning Luke and I were in the car on our way to run some errands. It was a quiet drive and the radio was playing softly when out of the blue Luke says to me, "Mom? What if I was outside naked fighting a squirrel?"

I said, "What?" Not sure if I heard him correctly.

So he repeats himself. "Moooom, I saaaaid, what if I was outside naked fighting a squirrel? I mean, that would be funny and tough?! Wouldn't it?

I am confused but its starting to register and the mental picture of what he is saying makes me try hard to keep a straight face, because he is completely serious.So I say, "Yeah, that'd be pretty tough to do."

Luke goes," Yeah! and they'd scratch you with their long nails if you were naked!"

I look in the review mirror to see him reveling in the thought of it and say, "Yeah, I guess so," and I think to myself,nothing in my life is boring. Not even a routine drive to the drycleaners. Proudly, I assume he gets this creative thought process from me.

Fruedian Slips are funny!

I joined the gym the other day. Actually I rejoined the gym that Tim goes to that I used to work out at like 7 years ago, when I was 25 and had nothing better to do with my life. Anyway, I found that saying to the membership guy at the gym that I was "re-joining" was a very important thing. He imediately gave me better treatment...and whipped through my paperwork for me! Afterward he profused thanked me and said, "Welcome, baaaack, Mrrrssss. Reeeeed." He had a weird way of drawing out his words.

Anyways, I go into the locker room, which is totally the bomb, steam room, towel service, robes, and tons of Japanese women who have no problem with nudity and I throw my stuff into a locker and head downstairs to work out in my old yucky stretch pants and ripped t-shirt that reads, Hey! Nobodys perfect.

When I get to my favorite place where all the glutieus maximus machines are, there are a couple of ladies on the thigh master machines. So I sit down on the machine near them and get to working out, but I couldn't help but notice though, how underdressed I was. The ladies were probably over 70 and had on Gold lame' workout pants, head bands, matching wristbands, full set nails, and jewelry. They had some European accents or something. Note to self: Get new workout outfit.

Later on I went to the gym's main room. There were more people in there and the machines were all new to me. So I walked over to the courtesy desk to get someone to show me the machines.

This young guy volunteers and afer showing me a couple of machines we walk over to this tricep machine. So I'm working out with it. You stand up straight with your elbows to your sides and then move this bar up infront of you up and down. So the guy, is talking away, you know, making sure the 2lbs I'm lifting isn't too heavy for me, and has a what you would call a freudian slip. As I lift the bar up he goes, "Do you usually have your lips like that? OH, I mean Your WRISTS. uh, yeah, your wrists...I meant your wrists....
Yah right. Heelloo! Anyway. I was kinda embarrassed and just pretended I didn't really hear him. But when I got home I couldn't wait to tell Tim how much I looooved the gym!!!!

Anyway, Tim says he is my new work out partner. He's going to show me the machines next time. Hee heeeeeeee!

The Harvard of all Kindergartens.

I want my kid to go to the Harvard of Kindergartens.

Almost time for the addmissions fair for private schools.
I heard today from a friend that she got up at 2am to stand in line to be sure to get her kids application in within the deadline last year. She said there were tons of parents waiting with lawn chairs and hot coffee for this!

I smiled politely and laughed a little bit, like I was totally not one of those nuts...... but secretly I was thinking, "lady! you don't even KNOW! I am crazy! I'll stay up ALL night to get my kids app in! You don't even KNOW! Sleep depravation means NOTHING to me! I've gone FOR DAYS without sleeping! Don't even mess! Sheeeeet!

Anyway, I'm thinking about all this school stuff and I gotta wonder if I want Luke to go to that school just to obliterate my own lack of formal education. or the memory of it....or

Maybe I just want my son to have the best opportunities.....

or Maybe I just want to sling the name of my kid's school around in conversations to make myself look cool.

Probably the last one.

Pre-School Parents Night

Well, I guess I've hit another life milestone. ahem...my first pre-school parents night.

I was nerve-wracked, but survived and was quite happy with the whole thing. All the parents met in the chapel, and as usual Tim and I were late. The last ones in the door, which happened to be the wrong door. It led to the front stage where the Dean was busy talking...oh well, at least we made it. We tried to nonchalanly get off the stage and find seats in the packed room. This stuff always happens to me.
Anyway, the talk we got was so dang long. I tried hard to pay attention but had had coffee before leaving the house.
"Hi, thanks for coming..blah blah blah........pick my sweater....and the room moms are so and so.....need manicure..blah blah....ect." Seriously, it was long. The bits that I did get were nice though.

The good part was when we got out of chapel and got to go the kid's classrooms to see all their art work. Now, that was cool. So cute! All the parents milled around totally thrilled with the macaroni their kids glued to their paper plates. Personally, I thought they were a bit elementary. I mean come on, can't they make something useful?......um....like jewelry? (Although I must admit that Luke's macaroni plate was totally awesome.....)

Anyway, I regress. So moving on, there were all these sign up sheets for parents to take part in different activities. I forced Tim to sign up for "Talk-about-your-job-day. So in a few months he will take his hard hat to the pre-school class and talk about how to do change orders! Ha ha. Just joking. Anyway, I seriously considered signing up as well and having a talk to the class about fashion. Like how to make your bath towel into an amazing gown, and in so many different ways! I don't know though, I wasn't sure about it so I just signed up to be a clown for the school Halloween party and pass out candy. I think I'll be a good clown.

Jake

Wonderful weekend at my in-laws, Dale and Marie's. I thought to myself. these people are the best thing that came with marrying Tim. I love the Reeds. All of em, even the dang nuts. Because I'm sure some consider me one of the "dang nuts!"

The latest news is about my nephew Jake. He is 12 and is having a terrible time at home in California. (Backstory: child protective services knows Jake's family and has been involved before.) His Dad and step mom were planning to send him to the Grandparents.


When Tim heard of this plan, he was outraged. He promptly called his sister and ex-brother-in-law and said there is no way in hell the Grandparents are capable of raising their 12 year old son.

However Grandpa Reed is heartbroken to hear the troubles that Jake is going through. Jake and Grandpa and Grandma are very close and he calls them frequently. Grandpa really wants to take Jake in. He would have if Tim hadn't stepped in.

So here it is. Tim is protecting his parents life, and its true, the activity a 12 year old wouldl bring with him would probably shorten their lives. But Dale made a comment that really resonated with me and for some reason I haven't been able to get it out of my head. He said, "If I can't even help a great kid that needs helpin', well, what good am I?"

There is something about that comment that has been bothering me so much. I can't put my finger on it.

On one hand, Tim is right, They are too old for someone to pass their kids off on. But why are they the only ones offering? Tim won't let him come to us, and everyone has some great reason why they can't do it. Why? No money. No room. blah blah blah. But I can't help feeling that, once I was just like Jake and what if everyone who helped me said, sorry no room, sorry no time, ect?

I don't know, I wish I knew what to do. Tim says we can't save the world and he is Done Done Done with raising kids.

hmmm. Anyone want a 12 year old boy?