A Day in the 'Hood.

My Neighbor

Her: So, do you compost?
Me: Eeew. No.Gross.Bugs.
Her:Well.You SHOULD, you know...blah, blah bla.
Me: Yah, well you know...we have a disposal and I'd hate to waste it.
Her: I see......Do you let your son eat Macaroni and Cheese?
Me: Yah.
Her:Well, I HOPE for his sake its ORGANIC.
Me: Oh, for sure. Definently organic!(lie)
Her: I see...so, do you go to Mommy and Me group?
Real Me:(Oh, no, I am so busy scrubbing with my organic soapsuds that I made from boiling my veggies that I grow in my own organic garden that I don't have time to hang out and do squats in a public park with a bunch of strollers and women who favor the art of breast feeding! Besides, when would I have time to listen to loud rock and roll and feed my kid Hersheys for lunch?)
Me: Ohmigosh! I would loooove to go to Mommy and Me workouts! YaY! What time is it? I will be there for sure!
Her:(weird look on face)5pm.
Me: smile serenly.
Real Me: (evil secret smile) Get thong spandex workout unitard in leopard. Bring along Marlbros.

Lukie the Philosopher.

Last night I was lying down with Lukie trying to get him to calm down and go to sleep. It was nice and quiet and I had finally threatened him enough I thought he was really going to sleep this time then he popped his head up and looks at me and says" Mom, you know what I'm finking about?"
I say, "No, what."
"I'm finking about brains." Then he smiles sleepily to himself and says,"My brains thinking about brains finking!" Then drops his head back down and falls asleep.
My son, the future philosopher, introspective genius.

Other funny sayings from the week:

We were driving to Grandpa and Grandma Reeds and from the back seat he says,"Mom, are there pirates on land?"(He's into Pirates of the Caribbean.)
I thought, Wow, good question. "Yes, acutually, they are called theives though."
He says,"OHhhhh.Cooooool." I still wonder if I said the wrong thing......I think I just messed him up.

We have our most profound conversations in the car.
Luke: Mom, do highways have families?
Me: Actually, yes they do. They are called roads.
Luke: But do they have kids too?
Me: Well, yes they do. They are called streets.
Luke:But do they have cousins?
Me: Shut up, I'm trying to hear my music.

A few Minutes Later.

Luke: Mom?
Me: What?
Luke:You know how much I love you?
Me:(smiling)How much?
Luke:Two hundred a hundred!
Me: Cool.